Ladies and Gentleman................................

Welcome to Tajik airlines – please observe/note the following:

1). You cannot book tickets more than 5 days in advance. This is because we change our schedule weekly if not daily and we enjoy the frustration this may cause our passengers trying to plan a trip.

2). Our prices remain the exact same regardless if  you book 5 days of 5 mins in advance of departure.

3). If the plane is overbooked this is not a problem for Tajik airlines. We just request that passengers squeeze over and the 3^rd passenger can sit on the edge of the seat.

4). There are no toilet facilities – we are not Ryanair

5). If you missed the safety statement – there wasn’t one.

6) Please note the emergency exit door. You simply negotiate the luggage and passengers on the aisle. Make your way to the front of the plane. Climb over the luggage there. Note the large man who looks like Kojak. Just ask him to get up to allow you exit the plane. Of course if you are looking for the emergency exit whilst in flight there is a high probability that this is simply a hopeless cause.

7) We don’t fly to Europe – for some reason the aviation authorities will not allow this. This has something to do with ‘poor plane maintenance’. We dispute this. 

Thank you for flying with Tajik airlines and we look forward to seeing you again on another Tajik Airlines flight. (We are the only internal airline in Tajikistan, so there is a high chance we will see you again)

Camping Trip in Iskandar Kul (Alexander’s the Great’s Lake).

For you history buffs out there this is where legend has it that Alexander the great came with his missus - Roxanna).

Oh folks this was at times the best/worst experience so far in Tajikistan.

The road trip was fine until we arrived at a local infamous tunnel that we had been warned about. Omg 20 minutes of terror. Windows closed due to pollution. The brief occasions I did open my eyes was scary. No lights cars driving all over the place to avoid huge holes and massive floods.

About an hour before getting there the road changed to what I can only describe as a sheer mountain road again with massive holes and flooding. Actually the way back was terrifying as we were on the lake side and my imagination went into overdrive thinking of what might happen!!!

But man was it worth it. The lake and mountains were just extraordinary the sheer scale and beauty my poor camera couldn’t do it justice. Went swimming in the glacier lake – the mountains surrounding it still have snow on them. I lasted for about 5mins, the first couple I could barely breathe it was so cold. It felt great mind you after drying off very exhilarating. The best thing was the weather it was lovely and cool and at night I even had to wear a fleece!!

 My apologies my picture does not do it justice!!

Sat night we (all 10 of us) were invited to a traditional ’osh’ dinner by a group of very distinguished Tajik men. It was fabulous cooked in the traditional way over a fire stove. Of course there was no electricity so I gave their head guy my head lamp. This endeared him to me for life and we bonded big time. It was amazing, the traditional way of eating osh is you share a plate and use your fingers. Now bearing in mind it’s a kinda sloppy rice dish and you might get an appreciation of just how difficult this is. Honestly it takes a while to master so I resorted to a spoon!!

We took a 1hr hike to a local waterfall – spectacular you literally are on top of it and great views. And there were lovely wetlands around the river. All in all a really enjoyable trip but……………….

Yes omg the toilets (hole in ground) – no detail required but suffice to say I had to fashion a DIY face mask. I literally thought I would get sick. It was so bad that when it got dark I reverted to my natural surroundings – trust me a lot more pleasant!!!

Pamirs

Hoping to fly there Friday fingers crossed. It depends on the weather, has to be very clear and availability. The plane only seats 17 and they reserve 2 for VIP’s. However I have warned about this flight particularly if you are of a nervous disposition. It literally flies very very close to the mountains at a low level. My friend Jan who flew here for our training advised that on her flight up people were getting sick and it’s only a 30min flight!! And naturally there are no sick bags. So folks me thinks I will be bringing a little plastic bag just in case!!

So hope your all well from Dushanbe to Dublin good night!!

Lainey xx

When and Irish lady becomes and English Lady.

Hi Folks,

Well yes I sorry to admit it but it’s just easier to say that I am ‘English’ and from London. The other choices are American or German so I played it safe!! To be honest most people here have never heard of Ireland. Which is fine, as I had never heard of Tajikistan before arriving here.  When I say Ireland it’s generally just blank faces all around.

I was in a Tajik’s house trying in vain to explain about Ireland.  So then I had a ‘eureka’ moment and mentioned U2 thinking this would work. But no, more ‘blank faces’ and then I said Bono a few times. This struck a chord and one of ladies faces lit up and she said ‘ah Boney M’. Oh god I was bent over laughing, and the more I looked at their puzzled faces the more I just could not stop laughing. The image of U2 and Boney M doing a duet – priceless!!!

My Neighbourhood:

Well it’s great for the first few weeks everyone just stared and stared again but now they are all used to me. And dare I say I am becoming very much accepted. The other night there was a group of older woman who I ended up chatting to for over 1hr. I was given food and tea and generally we had a great time. Not this is view of the fact that they speak no English and I speak pigeon Tajik. But it is amazing how you can communicate via sign language etc. It turns out that they own the flat I live in. But yes have now loads of dinner invites. So they are my new buddies – and naturally they introduced me to everyone on the night. I suspect they are the local ‘gossips’ for they seem to have a word about everyone in the vicinity.

But it is great – I feel very safe here and everyone is so friendly.  What’s very common here is literally every few hundred yards you will find a tiny shop. Usually, just a wooden shack with basic products – but very handy when your gasping for a cold drink. I wasn’t too sure when I first came what to do with my rubbish until I came across these two skips (see picture below). You basically just chuck it in, but thankfully it is collected regularly. There is no re-cycling to speak of but I leave plastics/glass to the side as I heard that older men look through the skips for this stuff.

Local Kids:

They now know my name and every time I head out I am greeted with a chorus of ‘hello elaine’. I allow myself an extra 10 mins so I have time to chat with them. The toddlers still just point at me and burst out laughing!! There is no computer games here folks its back to basics. There are no green areas at all so they play hop scotch and football (usually with a burst ball) and chasing.  It’s lovely to see them all playing there is such a strong sense of community all the older kids look after the younger ones and they all look out for each other. Anyway see picture below – the little fella in front with thumbs up is my little buddy.

Tajik Lessons:

Well had the one lesson and unfortunately didn’t go well. We had ‘creative differences’ and I didn’t care for the attitude so yep she was side lined.  I organised another lesson yesterday which went well. We just started with the alphabet using children’s teaching materials. Not sure if I will ever fully master this language am struggling already with the damn alphabet it’s just so different and I just can’t pronounce/say some of the letters. But in time who knows???? Anyway when I finish this blog its study time for me!!

National Foods:

One of the staunch favourites here is ‘Kurut’ which sort of looks like a toffee bonbon. And this thought was in my mind when I tried one. Oh dear god lads I nearly got sick. I was so embarrassed I had my hand over my mouth gagging. So yes well suffice it say it sure as hell didn’t taste like a toffee bonbon. It is basically very very sour yogurt. Everyone eats them here from a very young age. Anyway didn’t feel too bad about my reaction – all the expats that tried one had a similar exp.

Another favourite is ‘OSH’ it is basically rice, meat, carrots and meat cooked together. Like all foods here it’s unbelievably greasy. I actually like it, especially when I can get through the grease to taste the rice etc. They say it is cooked for ‘special occasions’ which does seem to be pretty much every night.

Unwritten Rules:

Ah yes Khujand is not unique in that there a lot of ‘unspoken rules here’ that really you just have to break and then try and understand what you have done.

For example the other day when taking a marshrutka there was no room in the back so I climbed in the front. Straight away I felt a vibe. Turns out that woman generally don’t ride in the front!! So yes lesson learnt but I don’t care in this heat it is just torture to have to crouch over in the back.

Having lunch the other day I broke off some bread for my plate and then didn’t finish it. So the waitress when she picked up my plate muttered something and I just knew I had done something wrong. So turns out it’s considered very disrespectful to leave bread on your plate. Wheat is one of the national symbols along with cotton. They have a have huge respect for bread going back to soviet times when wheat prices were high and bread very expensive. 

Movies:

Thanks to K+B I have a fine selection with me and enjoy a flick 2/3 times a week. Personal recent favourites Blood Diamond and I have to say ‘Borat’. Now I would never have watched back home but for some reason sitting in Khujand I was roaring laughing. There were parts that honestly I could relate to having lived here now for 1 month!!

Oh another favourite – the TV show ‘The Shield’ addictive viewing.

Facebook: 

Oh god never really used it in Dublin but am addicted to it. Think I am becoming a cyber space stalker. Just love looking at other people’s pages and photo’s so folks be warned!! However I suspect that I am not the only one suffering this predicament!!

Camping Trip:

Well it’s a long weekend here coming up and I’m flying to Dushanbe Friday. The plan is to go camping to a place called – Iskander-kul. It’s a mountain lake about 3hrs from Dushanbe and happy days very cool only 25 degrees and much cooler at night. I’m really looking forward to it and the chance to see more of Tajikistan.

So hope your all well from Khujand to Dublin good night!!

Lainey xx

Attack of the Bugs

Hi Folks,

Well it’s a feature of my life here – Cockroaches. They are huge (1 inch), very, very, fast and blend into the carpets. (I know now why they are all brownish in colour). So off I went a bought myself some powder stuff that kills them.

Monday night saw another one and went to put some more powder. He starts to climb the wall behind the sink. So to be honest I’m freaked out – they are really scary. And next thing he flies towards me!!

Ah lads seriously – I was stunned. I did an Olympic style dash into my bedroom and the little fecker followed me in. So there I am standing in my room wrapped in my bed sheet (for protection??)  screaming and jumping around like I’m on hot coals. Now in hindsight I appreciate that he was probably only reacting to my overreaction but that’s life!!

Now I can sense the sniggers and laughter but seriously a one inch bug that flies. No one and I repeat no one told me that the damn things fly. My poor neighbours were probably wondering what the mad foreigner was up to?

So my apt is now a booby trapped fortress for cockroaches I have lying around in no particular order:

Cucumber, Garlic, Powder, Several jars of water

Some dubious Chinese stuff I brought that’s supposed to be good

Huge quantities of cleaning products – my apt is spotless!!!

So if the damn food/water does not make me sick the various cockroaching killing products I have brought probably will.

Vegetarian Status:

Well back to favoured topic of mine. I decided to take the plunge and buy some minced meat in the market. Under normal circumstances I wouldn’t dream of buying meat in this kinda place. I mean slabs of meat hanging up with flies buzzing around???

So I brought it home salted it overnight –not sure why something to do with the heat. And the following night cooked some spaghetti Bolognese and OMG it was yummy. So happy have found meat again and am no longer vegetarian!!!

Local Fashion

For those of you on face book you will have already seen my dresses. But picture below is one of them. Now I appreciate that calling the garment below a dress is probably a slight exaggeration. SITC it isn’t – it’s sort of like just one large piece of material with matching trousers!!! Mind you haven’t actually worn it yet a bit nervous will wait until July when weather gets very hot!! The dressmaker lady in the picture invited me to dinner to meet her family which was very kind of her.

Royal Invitation:

Well sort of allow me to explain. The British embassy invited me to a reception next week to celebrate HRM 85^th birthday. I am registered with their embassy whilst here hence the invite. Very nice of them and it would have been lovely to have some nice food and wine – but not paying the $200 air fare sorry Lizzy!!

Swimming:

Yeah got out today to this huge man-made lake about 30 mins outside the city (see picture below).  The locals refer to it as the sea but it is one huge lake!! God it was great there are about 3 – 4 locations where you can go to swim. Oh thought I had died and gone to heaven – the water was lovely, cool and clean. Technically summer here doesn’t actually begin until 20/6/11 so it was quiet there today. But it’s a huge attraction for people from all over Tajikistan to come for their holidays. There are cute little houses all around the place for hire. There was no problems with us swimming but did wear shorts and t/shirt to be safe. Mind you would have done regardless because the sun is very strong here. When I was out of the water I was wrapped up in my towel terrified of getting burnt.

Oh so happy it was brilliant we plan to go now a lot more regularly if possible one evening after work and a weekend day – happy days!!

Tajik Lessons:

Yep starting the next week first up the alphabet!! It’s obviously very different but hopefully between the lessons and just general exposure I’ll start to improve. But I do find myself speaking a good few Russian words as so many people speak Russian daily. There is a little fella in my local shop who loves to teach me a new word every time I’m in there. Mind you as soon as I walk out its forgotten but he asks the next day. So we have now developed a little routine and that’s helping me too!! So who knows folks might well be speaking Tajik when I’m back.

It is actually a bit embarrassing my lack of language skills. Last night I was out with Germans/Ukraines/American and they all spoke 2/3 languages. My only saving grace is that I tell them I speak Irish and then when asked I honestly say ‘an will chead agom dul go di on Leitreas’ as that is probably the only bit of Irish I can speak

So that’s it folks another week gone time going fast here!!

So from me to y’all good night!!

Lainey xx

Sleepless in Khujand......................

Hi Folks,

Well I've yet to have an uninterrupted night’s sleep here in Khujand and it is not the bugs etc but damn animals. Right outside my bedroom window is a big green area that a local fella cultivates and every night most nights I have the pleasure of:

Dogs – Omg barking like mad I rarely see them during the day they must sleep all day and make up for it during the night

Cats – Ah yes I now fully understand the meaning of 'cat fight' not every night mind you but the first time I literally jumped out of the bed. Honestly is sounded a screaming banshee. Although I've never actually heard a screaming banshee but you know what I mean.

Cows – Are they having a laugh I mean don't animals sleep at night???

Roosters – I saved the best for last. When I first heard the 'cock a doodle doo' I looked at my watching assuming it was dawn but no its 3am. But I thought oh that’s kinda cute. After hearing this most nights 2/3 times I honestly want to go down and strangle the little bugger. (apologies to all animal lovers on this one). I know I am a city girl but how do people in the country sleep – am hoping I will get used to this. Even been deaf in one ear doesn't work!!!

Food Shopping

Khujand has the biggest 'bazaar' in Tajikistan and honestly it’s a great experience. The place is huge, outdoors and just so many stalls and they all seem to sell the same stuff (see picture below). My Kajik friend brought me around to introduce me to her favourite stall holders. The meat stall is 'unique' the animal is killed 'halal' style and sold on the day. So they have big slabs of meat that they just cut up and sell there and then. The ground/mince meat is in a big cardboard box that he just picks up and weighs for selling. I just couldn't bring myself to buy any – it’s daft but so different to what I'm used to and I have my doubts about the whole hygiene element!!

There is a whole element of bartering as well – it’s part of the system you haggle and get a few cents of the price. My Tajik is not quite up to haggling yet so I just give them what they ask for. They only sell foods that are season so right now plenty of tomatoes and cherries!!

Mini Meltdown

Yes had one the other night. Was just sitting down to tuck into fried spuds and eggs when I realised that I had cooked the spuds using the tap water aaahhhh!! You have to use the filtered water for everything and tap water for washing basically. God I was tormented starving and faced with a dilemma eat my dinner or risk been sick?? So the food was chucked and it was peanut butter sandwich for dinner. Lesson learnt though will never do that again. Of the four of us that travelled 2 have already been quite sick so I reckon it is only a matter of time before I am too!!

Local Customs

I have organised a new local translator – Nosa. Actually I can't even spell/pronunce her Tajik name so she told me to call her this. So she was telling me about her life. She is 21 got married @ 19yrs. It was an arranged marriage and she never even met the guy before. As is custom here she lives with her in laws. They have one bedroom with TV and they share everything else. She will probably live there most of her life. The husband is an 'only son' and she has an 'interesting' relationship with her Mother in Law. Something I think that perhaps is not unique to Khujand???

Dinner with Tajik Family

Another Tajik friend invited me to dinner tonight night and I’ve attached a photo of her lovely kids and a neighbour. Names are Sabina, Sabrina, Neeza and the little fella (so cute) is Shukira. I know I have completed misspelt their names but that’s how I pronounce them. The little fella as is custom here had all his hair shaven off when he was one – they were trying to explain to my why but it ‘it lost in translation’ They love when I come over as its very amusing for the kids to try and teach me Tajik. I think it’s great I learn loads when I’m with them.

Dinner was lovely – they love their nuts, apricots, cherries, bread and sweets here. And I was served one of the national dishes here. Its minced lamb with rice wrapped in cabbage. Now I’ll be honest it’s a bit of an acquired taste. But I reckon in six months I’ll have cracked it.

So that’s my life in Khujand!!

So from me to you good nite and I hope everyone has a great weekend.

PS: All my friends here expats and locals were roaring laughing when I was explained the concept of the ‘Irish heat wave’. 2/3 days of consecutive sunshine with temperatures of 25 degrees. Omg would I love 25 degrees right now!!

PPS: Paula I trust the punctuation is satisfactory??